One day while St. Francis de Sales was with an acquaintance, he received a visit from a gentleman of high rank, looking for a favor. The gentleman came to ask that a particular priest be granted a benefice (property or money specifically granted to and for the use of ecclesiastics). The holy bishop replied that he had tied his own hands when it came to giving benefices. Francis had established that, instead of distributing them at will, a priest should only receive one after participating in a competitive examination with other priests. Bishops don’t have the means to give such resources to every priest under their charge. So, by passing an examination, this priest would show if he, more than others, would make very good use of a benefice. Such financial allowances often came with extra duties that must be maintained, and it was important that the priests receiving them were responsibly suited for the tasks.

But Francis assured the gentleman that he would not forget his recommendation of a benefice, if this priest would offer himself to be examined with the others.

Unfortunately, the hot-tempered gentleman thought that this personal rule was just an excuse for refusing his request. He accused Francis of being dishonest and hypocritical, and he even had the audacity to threaten the bishop.

When poor Francis saw that gentle words did no good, he asked the man to agree to at least a private examination of the priest. This very reasonable compromise was not good enough for the angry man. So Francis firmly replied,

"You want me to entrust to him a portion of what is in my care with my eyes closed? Consider whether that is just!"

Instead of seeing the point, the man started shouting and hurling all kinds of insults at the holy bishop, who endured it all without a word. Finally, the unhappy man stormed away, leaving Francis and his acquaintance in peace again.

The acquaintance asked the saint how he could endure such insults without showing even a little anger.

"Do not be astonished at this," said the Saint, "for it was not he that spoke, but his anger. Outside of this, he is one of my dearest friends, and you will see after a while that my silence will increase his affection for me."

"But did you not feel any resentment at all?" the other pressed on.

"I turned my thoughts in another direction," Francis replied, "I thought about the good qualities of this person, whose friendship I had so much enjoyed before."

In time, the wise bishop’s words proved true. His friend, so furious last they met, came back to ask Francis’ pardon, even with tears. They became closer friends than ever before.